Regarding the Domestic Violence Murder of Staria Silva

Statement of Kristin Lyons, Executive Director of the Women’s Center of Rhode Island, and Deborah DeBare, Executive Director of the Rhode Island Coalition Against Domestic Violence

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Sunday December 26, 2010
CONTACT: Deborah DeBare; (401) 467-9940; Cell: (401) 782-7748
         Kristin Lyons; (401) 861-2761; Cell (401) 527-3023

“First and foremost, our hearts go out to the family, friends and community of Staria Silva. We are horrified and saddened by this act of domestic violence. Her tragic death is a stark reminder that we have a long way to go to achieve a Rhode Island that is free of violence in the home.”

 “Ms. Silva’s death marks the twelfth life lost to domestic violence in Rhode Island this year. In 2010, we have seen the highest number of Rhode Islanders lose their lives to domestic violence since the Coalition started keeping records in 1980.”

“Particularly during this time of year, when we gather with friends and family members to celebrate the holidays, we must remember that domestic violence happens here in our communities. No neighborhood or class of people is exempt -- people from all walks of life can be abused or abusive. No one is immune from domestic violence.”

 “Domestic violence escalates to the point of murder because our system has failed to either keep a victim safe or hold an abuser accountable. Unfortunately, when an abuser murders his or her partner, the tragedy is often portrayed as an unintentional “crime of passion” caused by the abuser’s overwhelming love for the victim or the abuser is said to “have snapped” in response to a situation.”

“In reality, at the very heart of domestic violence is the belief by the abuser that he or she is entitled to control his/her victim.  Understanding this teaches us that perpetrators don’t just snap or lose their temper; their violence escalates as their control begins to erode. Murder is the ultimate expression of the abuser’s need to control his/her partner’s behavior. There is never an excuse for abuse.”

“We all must make a commitment to reach out to anyone who we suspect is in an abusive situation. Help is available. There are six local domestic violence agencies in our state that provide a wide array of services, including 24 hour hotline support, emergency shelter, support groups and assistance with the legal system. We urge all Rhode Islanders to remember that if they hear or see someone being hurt to call 911 immediately and if they or someone they know needs support to call the statewide Helpline at 800-494-8100.”

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